"Your Web site makes me chuckle. It has some naughty swear words on it" - Tony Mott
Phreak Out 5- MGS2 - A Playstation divided
by Phreak 1/03/03

Well stone me for loving games too much, you zealots. I'm here to inject all with the Smack of Truth, and the forever-growing vein in my forehead will be my first target. I need that overwhelming feeling of sudden realisation coupled the urge to kill all hypocrites so bad, it might just put me off this little piece I call 'Rant Against Pompous Wankers'. Or maybe not.

Game logic
Y'see, it doesn't matter whether a game is good or bad nowadays, so long as it can appeal to one of two groups, hardcore gamers or casuals. And the logic is that if one group chooses to adopt a game as one of it's reference points in conversation, the other must reject it completely. Of course, this means that a great many people miss out on a great many games. Do they want to better themselves? Apparently not according to recent events.

MGS2. Since inception this game has been heralded as a defining moment for it's host console, if not for gaming. The effort with which this message has been pushed is nothing short of staggering. Every trade show, every magazine, every opportunity has been taken to promote this title, to the point where it's become boring. Even so you have to respect Konami's ability to whet consumers appetites. And then the game gets released. Oh dear.

In the zone
The early reports indicate there is less meat in the game than there is in a vegetarians stomach and suddenly, all the image manipulation in the world won't help Konami conquer certain parts of the market. Unfortunately, the game has slipped from the path of the normal and gone into the recesses under the shadows, that place where common sense has been rejected in favour of ridiculous pomposity. In short, it has entered... The Aloof-Shite Zone.

Fucking hell, what is wrong with some people? Here we have a perfectly fine, incredibly polished action game, and yet you feel the need to tear it to shreds. Why? How can you tell me that the game is anything less than a bloody good effort? It's better than the majority of PS2 content, yet the amount of criticism it has received is beyond belief. Christ, the amount of rubbish I've heard in the past few weeks...

'I saw someone play it\saw screenshots\never seen it ever. It's shit.'
I suggest you play it. Oh, and shut up.

'Got it on import, completed it, and its shit'.
Then why did you feel compelled to complete it? Did Raiden leap out of the box and hold a Socom to your head? Now that I'd like to see.

'I played the demo, and I didn't like it.'

Fair enough, but don't you think it's a wee bit short sighted to judge the game entirely on the demo material? Give it a rental at least.

'The story is absolutely appauling. What was Kojima thinking?'
Please. Can you offer anything comparable that doesn't include dragons of any description\grossly disproportioned, sci-fi inspired angst-driven tossers\Agent Denton? It's happy to be commercially driven, man. It is not the latest Ang Lee flick; don't treat it as such. Tell me, do you moan that T2 takes itself too seriously? Or that Aliens has Swiss cheese-like plot holes? You boring shit. Bet you think that Arnie has yet to fully express the emotional conflict he experiences as he rips another terrorists head off. It does what it's supposed to do (move the game from set-piece to set-piece), you shouldn't expect any more.

'Played it. It's shit.'
You have no sense of perspective. It isn't even close to being as bad as some of you make out, so why do it? Anyone with any semblance of a mind can work out for themselves what the game is: good.

It's tiresome to see this harsh backlash against what is ostensibly a good game, mainly because it's for all the wrong reasons. There's a difference between anti-dirge and anti-commercialism, and you lot have landed up on the wrong side of the fence. They haven't mowed the lawn in weeks either. Is your criticism levelled at the game in hand, or the regard that casuals (and the moneymen) have for the series? True, it isn't the meatiest gaming experience in the world, but it sure is better than Daikatana, and it's getting twice the flack.

That's not to say that the other side get off lightly too. It's almost as tiresome to hear fanboys proclaiming 'MGS2 is better than sex!' Surely you mean 'self-love', fool? At least they're half right. MGS2 isn't very good, it's just good. Why is there this need to make the game out to be a messiah or a pariah? It's completely beyond me. I'm a fence-sitter in that respect, and I'm proud to be one. We're all just perched up here laughing our arses off at you lot scrabbling around in the shit.

Badly spelt rants or back pats to: Phreak@phreaquency.freeserve.co.uk